tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7835350891440937592024-03-19T05:46:12.816-07:00My Atlanta AdventuresFor everybody who wants to keep up with how I'm doing in seminary and what's going on in my life in Atlanta.The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.comBlogger37125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-783535089144093759.post-9186068323896120552013-12-30T20:22:00.001-08:002013-12-30T20:22:08.367-08:00Engagement and MarriageI've been engaged for a whole five days now. I enjoy being able to use the word fiance and I'm excited for us to both wear our rings (mine had to be specially ordered because I have tiny fingers). That being said, I am not in this for rings or ceremony planning. In fact, I'm kind of dreading planning a wedding. I just want my family and friends to be there and be a part of the liturgical ceremony at the church.<br />
I've been thinking a lot about why anybody gets married or why we in particular are getting married. I know many people get married to the person they want to have children with. I think that's a good idea, but what does it mean if neither party is all that interested in producing offspring? What does marriage truly mean? <br />
Here's what I think it means. <br />
In contrast to other popular blogs about it, I don't think it's about putting the other person first. I approach our relationship knowing that my fiance is an independent full grown man who doesn't need me to baby him. Nor do I need him to put me first and neglect his own needs. He is who he is. I am here to help him on his bad days and to encourage him to follow his dreams. I expect the same treatment from him. If things aren't going as expected, we need to talk it out and compromise. We're equal partners. But that's the kind of relationship we've had all along. We don't need to be married to continue being there for each other and to encourage each other.<br />
I want to get married because I want to make a commitment before God to be there and be present with him through thick and thin. I want to stand before God and say, "I will be there". I want to invite God into the mix. I know that some time down the road I won't like my husband that much. I'll be mad about something, life will be hard, I will want to throw up my hands. These moments happen in even the best marriages. In those moments, I want to look at my husband and remember our vows. I want to invite God to help us through. I will need strength from God to be stubborn enough to talk it through and work it out. <br />
Marriage to me is ultimately a stubborn commitment. It's a wonderful joyous thing, but it's also going to be a lot of work. But we can invite God to be there in the midst of it with us. And I think my fiance is worth any bumps we may encounter down the road.<br />
When death do us part, I want to look back and be able to say, "Look where God led us" and "May God lead us further still". <br />
<br />
<br />The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-783535089144093759.post-90036035804496554062013-10-20T10:56:00.001-07:002013-10-20T10:56:19.364-07:00Sermon on the Unjust Judge 10/20/13Texts used:<br />
2 Timothy 3:14-4:5<br />
Luke 18:1-8<br />
<br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="line-height: 200%;">A woman with little power comes
before a powerful judge, the only person who has authority to help her.<span> </span>She is in desperate need.<span> </span>She doesn’t use formal niceties in addressing
him, she simply states, “Grant me justice against my opponent.”<span> </span>Perhaps she already knew about the judge’s
injustice, it obviously wasn’t a secret that the judge didn’t care for God or
people.<span> </span>He states his opinions on that
matter boldly.<span> </span>But since he, being a
judge, had been charged to protect the orphan, stranger, and widow, she refuses
to give up until he grants her protection. She is relentless in pursuing it.
She comes day in and day out, and she is always bold in her statements.<span> </span>She will stand for nothing less than justice,
and finally the judge gives it to her, not because he cares for her, but
because he is afraid she won’t stop harassing him if he doesn’t give her
justice.<span> </span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="line-height: 200%;">What does this story have to do with
prayer or God? First of all, Jesus very clearly states that God is not like
this judge.<span> </span>While this judge doesn’t
care for people, God has great concern for the oppressed, who cry to God day
and night. And while the judge has to be pressured to fulfill his duties in
protecting the downtrodden, God will not delay long in helping them.<span> </span>God seeks to always grant justice to
them.<span> </span>So why is justice not always
granted? Why is it that people have to fight for justice if God is willing to
grant it?</span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="line-height: 200%;">The unjust judge becomes a caricature
of why justice is hard to receive.<span> </span>In
big bold strokes, Jesus paints the portrait of why suffering can often go
unjustified.<span> </span>It is not because God
doesn’t want justice, it is because people can often ignore God or not care for
other people.<span> </span>In this caricature, the
complexities of power dynamics are simplified in those two statements about the
judge.<span> </span>He neither feared God nor had
respect for people.<span> </span>Those in power are
often less caring of those who have little, ignoring God’s care for the
oppressed. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="line-height: 200%;">That means that in order to gain
justice, people need to be persistent.<span>
</span>They need to come before those in power and demand that they give
justice.<span> </span>It’s an uphill struggle, but
just as the widow came before the judge daily, those working for justice have
to continue to put pressure on those in power.<span>
</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="line-height: 200%;">But what does this have to do with
prayer? The parable is prefaced by the words, “Jesus told his disciples a
parable about their need to pray always and not to lose heart.”<span> </span>Do we need to persist in telling God our
needs to encourage God to hurry up and grant justice? Many have heard that
message within this parable, and they argue that while God is obviously not an
unjust judge, you need to be persistent in prayer if you are to truly gain
God’s justice in your life.<span> </span>God is
similar to the unjust judge because God’s justice can often come delayed, but
it is not because God doesn’t care, but because God sometimes delays justice
for God’s own reasons.<span> </span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="line-height: 200%;">I don’t buy that.<span> </span>Jesus does tell this parable to encourage his
followers to be in persistent prayer, but God is not to be equated in any sense
with the judge.<span> </span>We are to be in
persistent in prayer not because God can sometimes delay justice, but because
we have to have strength to remain persistent against the injustices of the
world.<span> </span>Christ has one body within the
world, and we are it.<span> </span>We are called to
align ourselves with the widows, the oppressed, and those in need, continually
coming before the oppressors.<span> </span>God has
called us to help bring justice to the world.<span>
</span>God has called us to help bring justice for them.<span> </span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="line-height: 200%;">How are we to stand by them and not
grow weary and tired?<span> </span>How are we to not
lose heart?<span> </span>We have to stay in prayer.
How are we to understand our call? <span> </span>We
have to keep communicating with God.<span>
</span>Otherwise, we will turn away before justice is granted.<span> </span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="line-height: 200%;">This all sounds very weighty, and in
many ways it is, but it is not impossible. For God has not called each
individual to tackle all the oppressions of the world.<span> </span>We each have our own special call.<span> </span>There are calls that seem quite large, like
the call of Martin Luther King Junior to help lead a movement for racial
equality, and there are calls that seem quite small, like the call of a person
to drop clothes and food in wire baskets at the back of the church.<span> </span>But both of these calls are calls to march
with the widow, they both knock on the doors of those in power and demand that
the oppressed be given attention. And when God calls, God doesn’t consider one
call to be large and another small, because all calls help bring God’s justice
into the world. </span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: small;">
</span><div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 200%; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="line-height: 200%;">Dear siblings in Christ, I encourage
you to proclaim the message, be persistent whether the time is favorable or
unfavorable.<span> </span>Convince, rebuke, and
encourage with the utmost patience in teaching.<span>
</span>Carry out your ministry fully.<span>
</span>For God is calling us to stand by the widows who come up against unjust
judges, and we can prevail with ardent prayer. </span></span></div>
The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-783535089144093759.post-46499701674183517182013-09-27T12:44:00.002-07:002013-09-27T12:44:54.049-07:00After the Protest - Raw Thoughts We had an amazing protest at school today, protesting giving Rev. Eddie Fox a distinguished alumni award, because he has been a voice against LGBTQ inclusion in the United Methodist Church. Rev. Fox was not available to be at the awards ceremony, but this was our way to voice our disagreement with giving this award to a man who has worked to keep hurt in the Book of Discipline. We stood outside during the awards ceremony with signs, chants, and songs. There were stories of hurt and stories of hope shared. We were bold in our statements against the award. <br />
After the awards ceremony several people who were inside at the awards ceremony came out and thanked us. One elderly man in particular came out and told us to keep up the good fight. He was from South Carolina and had lived through the civil rights movement there. He told us that when protests and marches were going on in his community, there were many people who didn't understand why people were upset and wanted them to just calm down. He told us to fight on. I will always remember him and love him for his words of inspiration. <br />
I know that things will quiet down for a while now. The award will still be talked about and agonized over, but there isn't another protest planned. There is also less urgency now that this protest is over. But I don't want anyone to think that this is finished. Because for some of us who were affected by this, it won't be over for a long time. And I personally will never be okay with this award. I will never just get over it. <br />
I left the United Methodist Church voluntarily about a year ago because I knew that being queer jeopardized my chance of ever being ordained, and I couldn't imagine never being able to preside over the table at communion, never being able to teach and preach, never being able to help parishioners in their times of deepest need. It is what I'm called to and what I dream of spending the rest of my life doing. <br />
I also needed to be fully myself to be fully present to the people I was to help. I couldn't compartmentalize my life, because it wasn't going to be healthy for me and was going to hurt my ministry. I just want to be a whole me, with all my eccentricities, because I believe that somehow God can use all of me to help spread the gospel. <br />
So I left the UMC, and I came to a church where I can be myself. I love where I'm at, but I also had not quite gotten over the hurt I felt at the UMC's Book of Discipline. Then I heard of Rev. Fox receiving this award and about how he has worked hard to keep the wording in the UMC's Book of Discipline that made me leave the denomination. I could feel a piece of my heart break. My school hurt me, bringing all this stuff that I had been slowly working through to the forefront of my heart. <br />
If Rev. Fox hadn't been nominated for a distinguished alumni award by Candler, I could have probably worked through stuff and been able to appreciate the UMC for their strengths and occasionally go to services. I would never become United Methodist again, but I wouldn't hold any grudges. It was my decision to leave, I was never hurt by anyone, and I had actually been supported in becoming a certified candidate. I had to leave because I didn't feel that I was called to fight within that denomination, I was called to another denomination.<br />
But this Rev. Fox debacle stirred up stuff inside me, and the more I heard about how he worked at General Conferences to keep the wording that is hurtful within the Book of Discipline and the more I delved into the logistics of his work, the more disgust I felt. It's strange, but a distinguished alumni award given by my seminary made me unable to even consider stepping into a United Methodist Church in the near future. I can't do it, even if it is the most reconciling and gay friendly congregation in the denomination. I can't even go to our seminary's chapel services right now because they are too Methodist. There is something inside me that broke, and I may never be able to walk into a United Methodist Church again. The wounds of the words of the Book of Discipline run too deep, and I've learned too much about the battles at General Conference and how steep of a hill the Reconciling Ministries Network has to climb before the denomination will be fully inclusive.<br />
I will carry a scar on my heart for the rest of my life because of this award. It cut me in a way that a lot of people can't understand, and I can't fully rationalize myself. <br />
All I can do now is pray and work for Candler to become more inclusive. I want them to make policies that ensure that people who hold stances against the inclusion of lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer people will never receive another award from our school. We would not give distinguished alumni awards to people who are racist or sexist, we need to ensure that we would not give an award to someone who is against the equality of people of all sexual orientations and gender identities. <br />
This has hurt our community. I love my school, but I will certainly never be the same now that my school has given this award. I have been damaged, and that is not okay. It will never be okay. <br />
<br />The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-783535089144093759.post-47588446941347866632013-09-11T13:48:00.003-07:002013-09-11T13:48:51.079-07:00A Letter to Eddie FoxDear Reverend Fox,<br />
<br />
You will be hearing soon about students at Candler School of Theology who are protesting your reception of an alumni award. And yes, it's because of your stance on homosexuality. You've been a voice strongly in opposition of those of us who aren't straight but have been called to ordained ministry. You've helped to ensure that many of us who felt called while members of the United Methodist Church leave the denomination. In my own case, I know that I could have stayed and been well supported by people in my conference who know me and know my call. But in the end, I would have to stand against the Book of Discipline, and I couldn't bring myself to break the rules. I don't self-identify as homosexual, but that's not really the heart of the rule, is it? The point of the rule is to weed out those who aren't straight, and the good Lord knows I am not a heterosexual. <br />
I left for a church where my sexual orientation was about as relevant to the ordination process as my skin color. I must say, I am a more complete individual becuase I made that decision. I don't have to worry about the gender of the person I'm dating, because in the end, it's not relevant to how I live out my call. I understand that we are all first and foremost Children of God, given full membership in the church through our baptisms, and sent out to do God's mission through our confirmations. If it is God's will that one should seek ordination, why should one's sexual orientation be a barrier?<br />
There are two groups of people I wish you could meet. And I mean truly meet, without your biases leading you to judge those around you at the table.<br />
The first are the people like me who left the United Methodist Church because of the statements in the Book of Discipline. And it's not just gay people - there are plenty of allies too, who could not serve in a church that denies ordination to certain people based on their sexual orientation and does not allow pastors to perform same sex marriages. Many have turned away from the homophobia that is inherent in the statements found in the Book of Discipline. We're all doing ministry as God has called us to. Some of us are ordained or seeking ordination in different denominations and some are lay leaders. We're all serving the body of Christ, prayerfully working to help others deepen their discipleship.<br />
The second group are the people who stay and fight. You know some of these people already - they are the people you work against. But I think if you sat at the table with them, you would find people who are just as passionate about the United Methodist Church as you are. People who care about the global mission of the church and don't want to impede its growth in Africa, but cannot with good conscious allow their church to endorse homophobia. They are working for a better United Methodist Church, just like you are.<br />
I think you could learn much from these groups. I know if you sat at a table with me, you might be surprised at how much we agree on. I want to ensure that people have a clear understanding of the Bible and the tenants found within it. That's why I don't hang my hat on seven prooftexts that can easily fall when you look at the cultural context and the language in which they were written. The ancient authors of the text didn't have words for homosexuality, and the way the texts are used to endorse discrimination against homosexuals is a modern creation, brought about in the 20th century. Instead, I chose to focus on what Jesus told us to do. I agree full heartedly that we are to follow the Ten Commandments which point to the greatest commandments as given to us by Christ: Love God with all your heart and love your neighbor as yourself. I believe that in order to fully love God, one must be disciplined, ardent in prayer, and serious about Scripture, constantly searching for God's Word in the world today. I don't think that the church can be boiled down into humanist ideology either. There are certain things that the church should take a stand on, things the church shouldn't endorse. These are things that devalue God's children and make them feel less human than others. This is also why I cannot be a part of a church that does not give full inclusion to people of all sexual orientations and gender identities. <br />
I know you're worried about division and the idea that your denomination could split over the issue of homosexuality. You are trying your best to keep your church together in the way you think is best. But you are clinging to a statement that devalues the callings of many children of God and claims that they are less able to live out their callings to ministry because of the gender of the people they are attracted to. How can you truly love these children of God as your neighbor if you hold such a stance? <br />
I have to stand in opposition to your being awarded an alumni award because of these views. Candler School of Theology admits many children of God such as myself who have been hurt by these kinds of statements, who have been told by some denomination or denominational statement that they are less than others because of their sexual orientation. I cannot support someone who upholds those doctrines.<br />
<br />
Sincerely,<br />
Zebulun Treloar<br />
2nd Year MDiv Student<br />
Candler School of TheologyThe Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-783535089144093759.post-83358090041538569152013-08-13T18:07:00.004-07:002013-08-13T18:07:58.006-07:00A Year Since I've Left LincolnIt's a year exactly since I left Lincoln and ventured forth to move to Atlanta. I remember quite vividly the deep feeling of uncertainty and loss I felt. I went up to the top of the capital building and I gazed out over that city that I will always love and treasure. It was where I went to college, where I came out and found myself. And I stood up there and took it all in. Then I got in my car and drove away. It was a very emotional day, and by the time I got to my parent's house I was drained. I wasn't sure if I really wanted to leave, I just knew where my grad school was and I knew what I wanted to be. <div>
Today, I'm kind of amazed at how far I've come in a year. So I've decided to be superbly sappy and go back over what's happened in my life since then.</div>
<div>
Dad helped me move down to Atlanta, and when we came to move in, the apartment was a mess. It got cleaned up, but it still wasn't where I wanted to live. I put up with it.</div>
<div>
I met my friend D during orientation and he took me to my first Episcopal Mass. The pew arobics were a bit complicated, but he started me on my adventures into crossing myself, singing Psalm tunes, and bowing at the right time. I tried to come to every Wednesday evening Evensong at school. I found that I really love saints and the Eucharist. If you feed me spiritual food and tell me about those who have come before me in the faith, I find it hard to resist. </div>
<div>
This process of Episcopalization was aided by meeting Br. K. I was actually at first nervous to talk to him because he was the guy in the funny robes, and I figured he was some super pious dude. Turned out we have similar amounts of piety, and I came to monk meetings. That's where I began to love Compline and started learning about Daily Offices. </div>
<div>
Then I found love at the monk house kitchen table. Br. J was fascinating to me, and I fell for him while we were looking at a magazine of Catholic chatchkies. Go figure. Then he invited me to go to a haunted house with him that weekend. We ended up going to two and it goes down in my personal history as the coolest first date ever. After that I had to stop counting dates because we were together every single day. It was kind of ridiculous, but it worked for us and still does. </div>
<div>
J came with me to Thanksgiving in Iowa, and the day before Thanksgiving I got my legal name change. J was with me at the courthouse as I got the documents signed by the judge. There was much to be thankful about. </div>
<div>
I started talking to the bishop and looking at Episcopal churches, and I was recieved into the Episcopal Church on the second Sunday of Advent. I had been a pill that day, and J and I had an argument right beforehand, but when I came up to be recieved, J made sure he was right by my side.</div>
<div>
A little while later, he was right there as I took my first shot of T. </div>
<div>
The next semester I joined the Episcopal Studies program at school and got assigned to one of the best little churces ever. I love all that I do there and Fr. B is absolutely amazing.</div>
<div>
J and I also just moved into an apartment together. It's beautiful and amazing. I feel more grounded having a place to come home to that feels like home. I am finally settling in. </div>
<div>
I've also met probably some of the most incredible people and I feel extremely blessed. </div>
<div>
I am connected to my community in ways I never imagined.</div>
<div>
I miss Lincoln, and I will always be connected to Lincoln. It was where I found myself. But since coming to Atlanta, I've been able to be myself in ways I never imagined. And that's great too. I think I can call this place home for a while, maybe not forever, but for long enough. </div>
<div>
It's a good life. </div>
The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-783535089144093759.post-51936315280572922142013-08-04T10:04:00.003-07:002013-08-04T10:04:49.668-07:00My Sermon on the Rich Fool 8/4/13<br />
This is my sermon from 8/4/13. It is on Luke 12:13-21 with mentions of Ecclesiastes 1:2, 12-14, 2:18-23 as well as Colossians 3:1-11. I hope you find something in this sermon that inspires you and makes you think. <br />
Oh, and just in case you were wondering, I got very positive feedback on it. <br />
<br />
A large crowd has gathered around Jesus. He admonishes them to not fear those who kill the body, for they can kill nothing more. He tells them that when people are brought before the authorities because of their belief in him, they should not worry about their defense, because the Holy Spirit will tell them what to say. This is important business.<br />
Then a voice in the crowd pops up, “Teacher, tell my brother to divide the family inheritance with me.” I can imagine that Jesus would have been a little shocked about that outburst. That had nothing to do with what he was saying. So he replies, “Friend, who set me to be a judge and arbitrator over you?” In other words, “Do I look like your lawyer?” Then he turns to the crowd and addresses them all saying, “Take care! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; for one’s life does not consist in the abundance of possessions.”<br />
I can imagine this man standing in the crowd, barely paying attention to Jesus because he is so consumed with this problem of inheritance. His mind is so focused on possessions and wealth, he can’t listen to what Jesus is saying. There is a pause in Jesus’ teaching and this man bursts forth with his question of inheritance.<br />
He wasn’t wrong to ask Jesus about this. Rabbis and religious officials were often consulted on legal matters. They were the ones who knew the law of Moses and were able to interpret it. I imagine the man came to Jesus specifically because he had heard that Jesus was one of the best rabbis, and wanted to consult him. He was however so consumed with the matter, with his possessions, that he wasn’t able to stop and simply listen. He was so consumed with the injustice occurring in this inheritance battle that he carried it on his shoulders, and he couldn’t drop the weight. So there it festered until he asked Jesus. And Jesus never answered his question, he never gave him legal counsel. Rather, Jesus told him a story.<br />
It’s a story of a dream come true. A rich man’s land has just produced an abundant amount of grain. So much so that the barns could not possibly hold it all. So the rich man asks himself, “What am I going to do with all this grain? There’s no way I can store all of this.” He thinks hard and says, “I know exactly what I’ll do. I’ll tear down my existing barns and build huge ones. Then I will be able to store everything! And I will say to my soul, my innermost being, Soul, you have ample goods laid up for many years; relax, eat, drink and be merry.” This man thinks that he will be able to kick back for the rest of his life. He’s got it made. All his toil and labor has finally paid off. He’s going into retirement. <br />
But then God shows up and God’s not too happy. God says, “You fool! You’re going to die tonight, and all these things that you prepared, where will they be? So it is with those who store up treasures for themselves but are not rich toward God."<br />
This rich man is in the same bind as the first man. He’s become consumed with possessions to the point that he really can’t focus on much else. He works and labors to ensure that his wealth will be properly stored and maintained. He is consumed with it. He carries it on his shoulders with him. Worst of all, he thinks that his soul can relax because of his monetary gain. He doesn’t have to work on anything anymore, including his relationship with God. But in the end, all that he has accomplished is vanity, and a chasing after the wind.<br />
How often do we carry monetary problems and gains around with us? How often do we work and labor to maintain what we have or to gain more? How often has it become a consuming force? Something you can’t let go of?<br />
In our world, money is important, and it’s important to be responsible with it, but we shouldn’t be defined by it. Too often we are. Occupations and pay grades often define how we are treated in society. This past week Br. Jamie met a man at the Church of the Common Ground Bible study. He had been arrested for loitering, which is essentially an arrest for sleeping in the wrong place downtown. When he was arrested the police took his bag, which contained all his possessions, and they threw it away. It contained his driver’s license and other important documents. But nobody took care with the possessions of a homeless man. He was defined by his lack of housing. His poverty made everything he had worthless in the eyes of the arresting officers. Had he been arrested for anything else but homelessness, his possessions would have been stored and returned to him after he was released from jail, but they weren’t. His monetary problems, his lack of housing made him subhuman. He was defined by his lack. The officers arresting him treated him differently than they would have treated a person who had a place to stay. And that’s a problem with having a possession focused mindset. Lack of possession tends to be equated with lack of human value. And he was a man who was searching for a deeper relationship with God and was looking for resources to help him out of his current situation. Even if he hadn’t of been though, he should have been treated with the respect that any other person would have been given. He is still a human, a child of God. But in a possession obsessed world, he was a homeless person, and that was what defined him.<br />
Money is a fleeting thing, something that is given in abundance, often by chance, to some while others have to toil and labor for their share. The passage from Ecclesiastes today makes that clear. The Teacher bemoans that while he has toiled and labored to gain earthly wealth, he will eventually die and someone else will reap the benefits of his labor. Those who receive inheritance from him are not necessarily wise, nor did they work to earn their profits, yet they will inherit all that he has earned. So, “What do mortals get from all the toil and strain with which they toil under the sun?” In the end, it is all vanity, a futile endeavor. <br />
So why are we tied up with futility to the point that we shut out what Jesus is calling us to? Why is it so easy for us to treat others with less money and possessions with less respect, as if their lack of wealth meant they were less human? Money is important, jobs are necessary, but the ultimate definer of a person should not be how much they earn or what job they hold. Those things all pass away and get passed on to others. They are all ultimately futile. <br />
What does not die are the things that are of above. Your relationship with God does not die. All the time you have put into becoming a better disciple of Christ will not have been spent in vain. As the writer of our passage from Colossians says, “When Christ who is your life is revealed, then you also will be revealed with him in glory.”<br />
It is our relationship with Christ, the Creator, and the Holy Spirit, the holy unity and trinity of the divine that ultimately defines us and will stay with us long after we have passed from this earth. These are the things that should we should be consumed with, not our possessions or material gain. Too often our material focus makes it hard to see the spiritual in this world, it can cloud and consume us. But when we step back, when we open up to the possibilities that God is speaking into our lives, we are investing in something that lasts. <br />
So when possessions pressure you to turn inward, when money becomes scarce or abundant, when your world seems defined by occupation or lack of it, Take care! For one’s life does not consist in the abundance or lack of possessions. One’s life consists truly in the arms of their Creator. <br />
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The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-783535089144093759.post-11069307003238018162013-06-26T09:33:00.000-07:002013-06-26T09:33:24.124-07:00The Supreme Court Rulings and State AuthorityI'm going to take a dive into politics right now. <br />
The Supreme Court made several rulings that should appeal to people who believe strongly in state rights and want less federal oversight. <br />
First, the overturning of part of the Voter's Rights Act. I don't know whether this move was good or not, I don't have that much knowledge about the issues that were involved in this and I am distrustful about how this decision will be used, especially with the new laws that Texas wants to implement. However, it was a move that should appeal to those who believe in the sovereignty of the state. The Supreme Court removed federal oversight of voting laws in specific states and regions. That means that these states now have the power to make their own laws without federal control. <br />
Second, the overturning of DOMA. This means that what a state defines as a marriage is a marriage in the eyes of the federal government. If a couple living in a state with marriage equality gets a marriage license from the state, the federal government cannot say that marriage license is not legit in the eyes of the federal government. The state decides what is a marriage within that state's borders, and the federal government has to respect that. The state holds more authority in defining marriage.<br />
Third, the dismissal of the Prop 8 case. In this dismissal, the Supreme Court is saying that a federal court is not going to be the ultimate decision maker for an issue within that state. They let the ruling of the District Court within the state of California to stand, and as a result, marriage equality has been enacted in the state of California. They let the state court decide what marriage is in the state of California and they refused to make a sweeping federal decision.<br />
All these decisions upheld state authority in law making and removed or refused federal oversight. <br />
What do I think about all this personally?<br />
I think that I need to learn a whole lot more about the Voting Rights Act. But if you're a citizen over the age of 18 and aren't currently incarcerated, you have the right to vote. Nothing should hinder your access to the polls. I hope that the Supreme Court's decision will not result in laws and redistricting that would inhibit people's right to vote from being recognized or minority voices from being heard in law making bodies. <br />
I am happy that DOMA is repealed. <br />
I am also satisfied with the Prop 8 decision. I recognize that the Supreme Court could have made a decision that would have brought marriage equality to more states or even the entire United States, but looking at this from a purely legal standpoint, I think they made the right decision. <br />
I wrote this because I know some conservative friends of mine think that the DOMA and Prop 8 decisions had a "liberal bias", but actually all these decisions that were laid out this week show a respect for state authority. If you're someone who pushes for state rights, you should be satisfied with the Supreme Court's decisions, no matter your own personal ideology on the subject matter. <br />
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<br />The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-783535089144093759.post-77322239763139318032013-06-01T19:39:00.002-07:002013-06-01T20:27:57.015-07:00BSA and bad ChurchesThe Boy Scouts of America ruled a while ago that they can allow gay scouts as long as they are under 18. It was something that I thought was interesting, but the ruling didn't catch my attention until I learned that some churches were kicking out scout troops because of this. I've only heard about two churches so far, but the idea that a church could refuse to associate with the organization because of this decision makes my blood boil.<br />
I understand that some churches really do think that homosexuality is a sin and they try to remove homosexuals that refuse to repent for their "sin" from their congregations. I always thought this was horrible, but now there are churches going to new heights to remove gay people from their churches. They won't even allow an organization which accepts gay youth meet in their buildings.<br />
Think of what they are saying to young gay boy scouts. They are not "loving the sinner but hating the sin", they are saying that these boy scouts are so repulsive that they can no longer come into their buildings. They are punishing their entire troop for allowing them to still be scouts. This is horrific. In my opinion these churches are crossing the line. I can sigh and leave churches who believe homosexuality is a sin alone, because I have hope that God is still doing good through them despite them being wrong on this issue. But when they start openly doing hateful things to hurt people who are trying to support gay people, I start having issues. They are setting aside the greatest commandment, given by Jesus that states, "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and Love Your Neighbor As Yourself." How can you love your neighbor if you refuse to let them into your buildings? If you take away your support just because they don't kick gay youth out of their organization? I don't think that's what Christ would do, and as Christians, aren't we supposed to follow his lead? <br />
Part of me wants to yell at these churches, to organize people to tell them how wrong they are to do this. I want them to lose membership, to die out. I want their buildings to become vacant. I don't see how Christ can redeem people who do such an un-Christian thing.<br />
But God is God, and Christ is Christ, and that means that there is still hope. These churches could still turn around. There can still be repentance from these congregations. In ten years, the congregants could look at the time they kicked out the BSA for allowing gay youth and blush with embarrassment. I hope and pray that God redeems these situations. I pray that the decisions these churches have made do not leave lasting wounds on the youth they reject. I pray and hope because I know that the Christ who still proclaimed love after being brutally murdered is the Christ who refuses to let evil have the last say. The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-783535089144093759.post-56666954284332824302013-05-31T08:19:00.002-07:002013-05-31T08:19:28.618-07:00A Late Post About The End of the First Year My first year of seminary ended weeks ago, but I haven't said anything about it yet. I think that's because I'm not sure how to sum it all up. So many things changed, I'm not sure where to begin. From my legal name to my relationship status, from my denominational affiliation to my prayer practices, nothing has stayed the same. And I'm grateful for that. I am blessed beyond measure. And maybe that's how I'll sum it all up. It was a school year of blessings. It was a school year of wonderful changes. Being here has shaped me in ways I never knew were possible. <br />
I don't want to look at it through rose colored glasses though. There were things that sucked, that really really sucked. There were classes I disliked, there were projects I thought were ill planned. There were times when I was frustrated and angry. Life still had it's ups and downs.<br />
But it was a good year and I'm grateful for it. I look forward to next school year. <br />
<br />The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-783535089144093759.post-73514213206919709682013-04-11T10:01:00.000-07:002013-04-11T10:01:00.479-07:00Reclaiming the BibleWe had a discussion in my Hebrew class yesterday about newer Bible editions. We looked at the fad of Biblezines and some newer study Bibles. The problem that my professor pointed out was not the flash or even the fact that there were random notes and nonbiblical quizzes in these Bible editions. The problem is that the Biblical text gets lost in the notes, and people turn to the notes instead of the text. This is because we have this modern notion that the Bible is supposed to be clear and easy to understand, that it's a like an owner's guide for human life. People get frustrated when they discover that the Bible isn't that, so they turn to the notes in new study Bibles that tell them how these texts apply to their lives. Meanwhile Bible literacy rates in the United States continue to decline, to the point that many Christians can't even name the first book of the Bible. We are losing our scripture to Zondervan's "Life Application" notes. <div>
This made think about how the Episcopal Church uses Biblical texts. Part of the reason why I became Episcopalian is because services are steeped in scripture. There are at least three readings at every service, along with a sung Psalm. Morning prayer and compline are scripture and printed prayers. Everything is steeped in the Bible. Yet I wonder how some of the Biblical passages are recieved. The Old Testament is rarely the topic of the sermon, and often I think we lose how the readings connect. Preaching from the Gospel is beautiful, but wouldn't it be powerful if we could find ways to connect it to the OT and Epistle readings as well? I fear that parishoners, while hearing all these parts of scripture read or sung, can't comprehend what is going on with them. The scripture is heard, but the meaning is lost. </div>
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If nothing else, we as Christians need to seriously consider what is being taught in our parishes. We need to ask "How Bible literate are our congregants?" Maybe we need basic Bible instruction courses, maybe we need to spend some time on basic Bible concepts in sermons. We need to help people understand that despite the billboard slogan, the Bible is not "Basic Instructions Before you Leave the Earth", it is a library of stories about struggle, about asking, "Where is God? And what is God up to?" It's not an instruction manual for individuals trying to improve their faith, it's a library of texts centered around a communal story of struggle and endurance, of joy and sorrow, of exodus and homecoming; it's a story that is deeply steeped in the mystery and wonder of God. We can only step into the mystery if we stop trying to find answers for our individual lives within the text and instead seek to find God within them. </div>
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It's time to reclaim the Bible as God's Word, not as the word of God specifically concerning living our human lives, but as God's mystery revealed through text. </div>
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The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-783535089144093759.post-31128011352132685312013-02-28T06:15:00.002-08:002013-02-28T06:16:03.380-08:00Deconstruction and LentThere's deconstruction going on at school. The old school of theology building is being torn down and an addition to the new one will be added. I get to watch this all happen between classes. Workers pound to get the old window frames out, others take tiles off the roof. Everything that once made the building is being stripped away. It is becoming a husk, a shell of what it used to be. Soon it will disappear and something new will take its place.<br />
As I watch this slow, steady process, I can't help but think about how appropriate this is for lent. Lent is about going inward and contemplating where you really are in life. As you go inward, you start first with your complete self, the building before demolition. It looks nice, but there's usually something lurking under the surface that needs to get fixed. So you go in deeper, you explore every nook and cranny, you decompartamentalize yourself, deconstructing the bits that just won't do. You tear away the old windows, you get down to the bare husk of yourself. Of course, in the case of the building, the whole thing will be torn down. Lent isn't about getting demolished, it's more about renovation, but the construction sight still provides good imagery. <br />
Of course, this is a difficult process and can't really be fully accomplished in 40 days, but we work on little bits every spring. For example, this lenten season I'm looking into the parts of me that are judgmental, I'm examining why I feel threatened or insulted by certain ideas. It could be that they are legitimately wrong and harmful, but mostly it's because I have different view points and simply can't understand where others are coming from. I'm deconstructing the part of myself that holds strong beliefs, I'm looking at it, putting the majority of the bits back in their place, but modifying others as I find necessary. This is not done on my own of course, I have to delve into conversation with the divine. For without the divine, how can I know what to keep and what to modify? So I pray, and slowly I find the places that need some help. Together, God and I are doing something. And if I walk away from lent this season with no significant differences in my views, at least I looked at them.<br />
I ask that you take some time to think about deconstruction, to ponder what it means to your own lenten journey. Where does it push you? What do you need to deconstruct in your life? Just ponder and reflect. Then turn to God and just simply be with God. Read the word, pray, do what you love to do with the divine. See where you are called to go, what you are to do. Take out the pieces of your life that hurt and examine them together. If it hurts too hard, find resources to help you. But I encourage you to reflect.<br />
God's Peace be with you.The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-783535089144093759.post-9772345053757923812013-02-16T10:12:00.003-08:002013-02-16T10:12:42.148-08:00Biblical ProphetsWe've been reading the books of the prophets in class, and it's a puzzling collection of oracles, both of condemnation and hope. <br />
Often the condemnation is for the same problems.<br />
The people have turned away and worshipped other gods. That's the part that we seem to like to emphasize, and it's an important part of the prophecies found in scripture. Sometimes we even use that bit to get introspective and ask ourselves what gods we are following that are leading us away from the one true God. That is important, but we can't stay there.<br />
The people have not cared for the widow, the orphan, the oppressed. This gets emphasized in our churches a little less, mainly because it makes us feel like we aren't doing enough. I can't tell you how often I've heard these prophetic words and felt condemned. No, I haven't cared for all these people like I should. I haven't stepped it up and gone the extra mile. I'm sorry, but I just can't give to everybody. I don't have the money to give to multiple charities, and I don't have the time or choose not to use a lot of my time to help everybody else out. I feel like I'm almost a failure as a person of faith. <br />
Of course we could help this situation by realizing that this is the condemnation of a nation as a whole, not every single citizen. Yes, we as citizens of the family of God are called to help out, but we as individuals don't have to take it all on. We are called to specific areas of concern that take on special meaning to us. As a collective, we can cover all the bases. <br />
I think what we fail to truly emphasize within the prophetic works is the mixture of condemnation and hope. We either take the hopeful words or the condemning words and separate them from the words that surround them. But even within the chapters of condemnation, there are glimmers of hope. There is an oscillation between the two, a balance that is often lost within the church setting. We never seem to mix them But what if we did? People are condemned because of their actions, yet God still cares, still loves the people. God mourns when the people turn astray and God awaits the day when people turn back. It's hard to think of God's condemning of the people, it seems harsh and inconsiderate, leading many in popular piety to think of that punishment as coming from the God of the Old Testament. But even when the people are being cast into exile, God still speaks of hope, of a future. There will be a time when the mourning will be no more. This is not a spiteful God. It's not a warm, cuddly, lovable Jesus, but it's not a demon either. There's a balance.<br />
And maybe when we take the prophecies as a balance between condemnation and hope, we can see the balance that was present within Jesus' ministry. Maybe we'll have a more balanced Christ. After all, if we believe God spoke through the prophets, then Jesus, being fully human and fully divine, should have a similar voice, right?The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-783535089144093759.post-38024856090274444372013-01-28T09:18:00.001-08:002013-01-28T09:18:25.308-08:00If you look like a monk...Last week I was hanging out with my friend, Br. K. I told him that I'd like to read the books on the postulancy reading list for his monastic order over the summer, and he asked me again if I was interested in joining the order. I told him I didn't think I was called to monk-hood, and he said something that stuck with me, "You know, if you look like a monk, and act like a monk, you might just be a monk."<br />
Now I'm not making any plans to become a monk, but it's made me wonder what is it that makes someone a monk? What is it that defines the monastic life? The priesthood and other religious leadership roles seem so clearly defined, but monastics aren't. They aren't marked by vows of celibacy, because some monks aren't celibate. They aren't marked by communal living, because some don't live in community. What is it that marks these lives? <br />
It seems to me that what ultimately marks a monastic life is a commitment to living in right relationship with God, a devotion to a simple lifestyle without a materialistic focus, a lot of prayer, a lot of sharing life together in an honest way, and a shared calling to a collective mission. Maybe that is too simple of a definition of a monastic life. I don't know. But if that is the definition of a monastic life then Br. K was right. I might just be a monk.<br />
Am I going to join an order? I would never say never, but not in the foreseeable future. I currently do not feel called to take on the robes and the label, but I do enjoy sharing life with others and strive to commit more of my life to prayer. I think I'll just live as someone who is monastically inclined.The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-783535089144093759.post-60024618462307923852013-01-11T06:44:00.000-08:002013-01-11T06:44:29.148-08:00My Epiphany ResolutionI made an Epiphany resolution this year, something I hope will bring me closer to my fellow sojourners and closer to Christ. My resolution? Learn to forgive and seek to understand the conservatives of this nation. I'm talking the Republican Party. I grew up liberal, and I mostly agree with the politics of the Democrats. However, I have begun to pay attention to how this two party idealism affects our relationships with our fellow Americans. That deep divide between parties that we see in DC didn't just appear out of nowhere, it's in our communities, our friendships, and our families. It affects how we communicate with others, and not just our political discussions. For example: on Election Day, two friends played a trick on a mutual friend. While watching the election results, they pretended that one of them was a Republican, and their mutual friend is a strong Democrat. The mutual friend almost had issues sitting in the same room as a "Republican" and even almost left to go into another room to watch the results. She was quite relieved when she learned he was also a Democrat. While this was a joke, think about how often this is the case with people of differing political parties. We have problems interacting with one another because of politics. I've begun to pay attention to these patterns within myself and I am just as bad as anybody else. I'll drive through an area with conservative signs and begin to judge the people in that area. They obviously have "bad politics". I refuse to listen to what the Republicans in the House and Senate are saying because they are "just defending their party line". I've begun to realize how unChrist-like these behaviors are. Every time I turn on my blinders and refuse to pay attention to someone, I'm devaluing them. They aren't as important as other people, they are Republican and therefore not as good as the Democrats. Now I'm not saying that I have to agree with their politics, I just want to become able to listen to them without getting mad at them. I want to learn to recognize that politicians are politicians, and there isn't something that makes a Democrat politician any better or nobler than a Republican politician. This is hard, and even as I type this I want to cite examples of unjust things Republicans have said. I want to point out the flaws in some of these politicians' characters to make the whole party seem worse, but that's not Christ-like either, and that continues to devalue and divide.<br />
Ultimately, politics are not about which party is better or worse. This isn't some great battle between Democrats and Republicans, a showdown to see who will win out in the end. It has become that way in the media, and all that warring has led to a divided nation. Politics are about trying to figure out ways to keep a nation going as best as possible while respecting the civil liberties given to each citizen. Right now, this party war is stalling that. So if I can learn to forgive and gain an understanding of conservatives, not only can I break a cycle of devaluing others which is unChrist-like and destructive, maybe I can help bridge the political divide between others. And if just a few of us begin to refuse to play in this party war and instead insist on working together, maybe we can build a better country. That's my hope and my Epiphany Resolution. The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-783535089144093759.post-40785850576035625822012-12-15T15:29:00.002-08:002012-12-15T15:31:46.385-08:00My response to tragedy<span style="-webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(175, 192, 227, 0.230469); -webkit-composition-frame-color: rgba(77, 128, 180, 0.230469); -webkit-tap-highlight-color: rgba(26, 26, 26, 0.296875); font-family: '.Helvetica NeueUI'; font-size: 17px;">I pray that the God who breathed the breath of life into humanity, who listens to eir children, who even sent a messiah into this world to proclaim eir love, who came back after being murdered and said, "Tend my sheep" (love my people), can be felt in the world today. There is so much tragedy, so much heartache, and I just pray that people are able to sense God's love despite the tragedy of human sin. I fully believe that God weeps with us, and laments with us. I believe God holds all those who can barely breathe because of grief in eir loving hands. I believe that God does not cause tragedy, unfortunately humans have the power to do great evil, but God will always be there for the wounded after tragedy strikes. </span><br />
<span style="-webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(175, 192, 227, 0.230469); -webkit-composition-frame-color: rgba(77, 128, 180, 0.230469); -webkit-tap-highlight-color: rgba(26, 26, 26, 0.296875); font-family: '.Helvetica NeueUI'; font-size: 17px;">I cannot say what should or should not be done after tragedy, but I do hope that people can find God despite the carnage and the wreckage. If they need to, I pray that people are able to take their anger and deepest grief to God. If they need to scream and yell at God, I pray that they are allowed to do so. I believe that God can take their words and I know God will still hold them when the anger leads to sobbing. From the depths of despair, the depths of Sheol, we can always cry to God. </span><br />
<span style="-webkit-composition-fill-color: rgba(175, 192, 227, 0.230469); -webkit-composition-frame-color: rgba(77, 128, 180, 0.230469); -webkit-tap-highlight-color: rgba(26, 26, 26, 0.296875); font-family: '.Helvetica NeueUI'; font-size: 17px;">I pray that we are able to give our responses to tragedy over to God, and somehow God can redeem acts of despicable human violence. That is what I pray for our world today. </span>The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-783535089144093759.post-60188077138775788892012-12-11T12:21:00.003-08:002012-12-11T12:21:44.539-08:00My Christian Education RantI was talking with a friend about issues within the church universal. The subject quickly turned to the devaluation of young people in the church. Now I'm not talking about the need to have young adult representatives or youth representatives involved in church functions. I've been there and done that, and most of the time I had to wonder, "Am I here because of my age or am I here because I can really help you out?" and the answer was usually that I was young. (Side note: Have you ever noticed that the younger you are at a church meeting, the more attention you get? It's usually not the kind of attention where people are honestly taking in your ideas, critiquing and incorporating them if they benefit the church, it's usually the "oh my gosh, someone under 40's actually here" kind of attention) I'm talking about the refusal of the church to do real Biblical studies with their young members. Of course, the church has a hard time doing real Biblical studies with their adults, but that's why I think it's especially important to do them with the youngest among us. Somehow we think that youth want to watch DVDs where random people talk to them about "issues" and maybe give them a piece of scripture to tie everything together. Youth group often devolves into "Let's play games and do a morality lesson so we can be better people". That's not going to grow our church or create authentic disciples. Give the kids scripture, give them the conflicts of the texts. I think youth Sunday School should look a lot more like my Old Testament class and a lot less like goof off hour. It should be engaging, they should be diving in, learning about conflicts in the texts, looking at extra-Biblical sources and trying to figure out what this God they worship actually looks like. Of course that involves training teachers, so there'd have to be a commitment of the adults involved in our youth programs to study and struggle themselves, but there's no reason why they couldn't do that right along with the kids. It would have to involve someone actually putting out a decent Bible study program or the priest/pastor getting involved and using the Biblical knowledge they accrued in seminary, but I think it could be beautiful. Imagine if what was taught in the seminary classroom was commonly taught in our churches, in our Sunday School classrooms, to our teenagers and young adults. What if people knew what modern Biblical studies scholarship actually said about the Bible? What if it was actually relevant to how the church operated? <br />
Now, I say this, but I'm not a youth person. I don't know much about working with youth or anything like that. Also, I don't think I'd necessarily be the most effective at implimenting a change in our Christian Educational system. All I know is that if we want to have effective and relevant disciples of Christ, we need to teach people about the God they follow and the Bible they read. We might as well start with the young ones, because if they don't find relevance in the church in their younger years, they probably won't be around when they're older.The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-783535089144093759.post-5187605777704063012012-12-06T03:58:00.000-08:002012-12-06T04:59:23.435-08:00Becoming EpiscopalianI am officially becoming part of the Episcopal communion on Sunday and I assume that many people are curious about this new development in my life. Why on earth am I leaving the United Methodist Church and becoming Episcopalian? Am I really making the right decision? First I'd like to say, I've asked myself those questions over and over again. They make me stop and ponder what it is that God is doing in my life right now. <br />
I guess I always assumed I'd be United Methodist forever. I was a third generation United Methodist, it connected me to my grandparents on both sides, and I was proud of that fact. I was an active church member, I was an intern at my church, I served my Annual Conference, I was a leader. Why would I leave something I knew so well and had a passion for?<br />
I can say this: I'm not leaving because I have a major problem with the church. There were no fights, no heated discussions that turned me away. I am not leaving out of anger or malice. I'm leaving partially because I think the denominational structure is too big. I love the congregation I was a part of and the Annual Conference I was a part of, but I disagree with having large overarching structure that puts out a Book of Discipline and tries to run an effective and efficient church in that manner. I think that the system has become cumbersome and has held back church progress. That's not to say that I don't believe that churches should be structured and organized, I am after all joining a church with bishops and a loose national structure, I just think the global structure of the United Methodist Church is too rigid. It doesn't allow for regional differences in belief systems within the global church. Who is to say that rules about how to structure your church that comes from white middle class Americans really works for the African church? As I looked more into the structure and system of the national and global United Methodist Church, I began to seriously question whether following one Book of Discipline was really something that was best for the church. I began to also seriously doubt if I could connect myself with the Book of Discipline in my own personal ministry life. There were some rules that I simply did not feel comfortable with, and I am not going to go against rules and regulations set out by my church. I am not a rebel, I cannot knowingly break rules. It makes me uncomfortable and makes me feel guilty. And I kept thinking questions like, "What if one day my friends want me to officiate their wedding and I have to say no because they are a same sex couple?" It would break my heart and I questioned whether I could stand in a United Methodist pulpit after something like that happened. <br />
All that being said, those are the reasons why I began to question the United Methodist Church. They are not the reason why I'm becoming Episcopalian. That was a much more natural thing, something that began the first week of seminary and has progressed since then. It all began the first week of orientation with a friendship. Since I have not asked his permission to mention him on my blog, I shall call him "D". D is an Episcopal Studies student and we became close friends fast. One Sunday he took me to his favorite Episcopal Church in town, and I was struck by the liturgy and the emphasis on Eucharist. I enjoyed the service. So when D asked me if I wanted to go to the Evensong service at school, of course I said yes. Things progressed and soon I was hanging out with Episcopal students and Br. K, the abbot of an order of monks in town invited me over to the monk house. As soon as I started doing complines with the monks, I was sold. I loved how everything was so scripturally based and so meaningful. I of course resisted the idea of becoming Episcopal every step of the way. I was United Methodist, it was part of my heritage. But the more I was at Episcopal services and doing the daily offices, the more I needed it. The liturgy and eucharist soothes my soul. The use of scripture in almost every aspect of the service is enriching and enlivens me. I walk away nourished. When I talked to one of the Episcopal bishops, I learned about a church that isn't as structured denominationally and has a lot of leeway and freedom within each diocese to do as they see proper within their context. This both terrifies me and excites me. So I'm joining the Episcopal Studies program at school and I'm joining the Episcopal church. It's honestly one of the scariest decisions I've ever made, but I am so happy with it. I can't wait to be a priest, to preside over the table, to lead people in morning prayer. I am free to be me, and I am in a church structure that supports me. That's why I'm becoming Episcopalian.The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-783535089144093759.post-91338178336435041772012-11-12T19:07:00.001-08:002012-11-12T19:07:31.679-08:00Clinging to the CreatorI've been doing a lot of soul searching and questioning recently. My question to God always remain the same, over and over I ask, "Where are you leading me?" and I get brief glimpses, but I'm really not sure where my life is headed. I cling to my creator.<br />
I've noticed that in times when I'm really lost, really wondering what is going on, I tend to cling extra hard. The music in my car changes from today's hit music to Newsboys and Aaron Schust, I search diligently for a decent Christian radio station. Prayer time becomes not only necessary, but increasingly more frequent. It's not enough to read scripture and pray once a day, I need it several times a day. If I can go to a worship service, I do, and I fret on the days when there's not one available to me, wishing and hoping for community and guidance. I just can't get enough. I'm at one of those places right now, where I just want to take in Christ and find some sort of answer. I search diligently for guidance, I long for it. I can feel Christ's presence, but I can't find a firm answer. It's a weird mixture of comfort in the creator and dis-ease in my spirit. I search, I hope, I long. I wait. And I wait. I know the answer will not come tomorrow, I know it will not come the next day, so I cling with all my might to my creator, redeemer, and sustainer. I cling, and I wait.<br />
It's a hard lesson, learning to wait, learning to find comfort in the clinging. I pray for some voice of revelation, something that will make my path clear and fill me with renewed vigor. But right now, I must cling. I must hope. I must search. Someday my path will be made clear, but it will not be today. It will not be tomorrow. It may not even be next week, next month or next year. I must simply learn to use all my spiritual tools to cling to my creator, for I am not abandoned, my prayers are heard, they are simply answered with, "Patience my child, cling a little longer."The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-783535089144093759.post-6316711943636720882012-11-05T14:03:00.000-08:002012-11-05T14:03:02.187-08:00Patterns and Well Worn TapesI've been spending a great deal of time around the monk house recently, and I've noticed my old thought patterns have started to pop up. Pulling up to the house today, I thought, "Maybe I'm spending too much time here...Maybe they don't really like me that much...Maybe I'm a burden to them..." Thoughts like this were once part of my daily life, something that even a year ago would keep me from asking a friend to hang out or going to an event. They were never debilitating thoughts, I still had friends and connections, but I would never spend more than a few hours a week with any given person. <br />
Now I'm spending quite a bit of time around the same people, and the thought patterns have started playing again in my mind. They are the well worn tapes of a person who spent a good chunk of their life distrusting their self. I don't pay them much credence anymore, but they still echo in the back of my mind.<br />
I wonder what it would be like if they were not there. Who would I have been closer to if it were not for these tapes? How would my life be different? But then I realize that there is nothing wrong with my life now, that I have been brought by the grace of God to the place I need to be. I just have to keep remembering that the tapes of my yester-years are not the tapes I choose to play today. They echo, but they do not define. Instead I set my life to a new tune, a new tape that I hope to etch into my brain, "You're a good person. Trust yourself."The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-783535089144093759.post-38042043634140632652012-10-26T06:41:00.001-07:002012-10-26T06:41:00.839-07:00Deny YouselfI was at a meeting at the monk house the other night, and as we were discussing the Philokalia, a Bible verse popped up that had always bothered me. It was Matthew 16:24, "If any want to become my followers, let them deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me."<br />
In the past I felt that this verse was convicting me to deny and give up parts of myself that didn't fit into societal expectations to better follow Christ. I took the parts of me that didn't seem acceptable, and tried to hand them back to God. I ended up damaging myself because the personality traits and quirks that I didn't think I should have really didn't go away, I just began to shove them under the mask of a "good Christian". Nobody said I had to do this, or that it was best to be a certain way, I was just uncomfortable with me.<br />
I shared this, and then my friend began to share this verse in a way that was brand new to me. He started at the point, "take up their cross". Our crosses are the selves that God has gifted to us. They are our unique personalities and convictions. They are the people God made us to be. Jesus didn't die on the cross because he was the perfect model Christian, he died on a cross because he refused to give up the person that God made him to be. He was authentically himself to the end. In the same way, we should take up our crosses, refusing to be any less than the people God calls us to be. We are to remain true to ourselves and our God to the end. <br />
The phrase "deny theirselves" or more personally, "deny yourself" then is not about giving up your personality that was given to you. It's about stripping off the masks, about releasing those things that hold us back from being kingdom builders for our creator. It's about refusing to simply try to fit into what society tells us we should be. We have to look to God and wrestle our demons, we have to fight for our authenticity. We have to deny the trap of trying to become who we "should" be, and instead strive to become who we were created to be. "For what will it profit them if they gain the whole world but forfeit their life? Or what will they give in return for their life?" (Matt 16:26) <br />
This was a healing moment for me. I was brought into a text that I had used to wound myself before and it became a text that I could embrace. It became something that spoke to my experiences and my hopes. I have been striving to truly find my authentic self and speak to my truths, and while God has always been a major part of that journey, I didn't have a sense that Jesus had ever really talked about this. Now I can look to the Gospels and see Jesus speaking these words as well as others to me. It brings me closer to Christ.The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-783535089144093759.post-30718294598399336472012-10-12T08:49:00.002-07:002012-10-12T08:49:16.572-07:00Lessons in CommunityWhen I moved to Lincoln, I knew what I wanted. An education, of course, but more importantly I wanted to reboot my life, to find myself, to become comfortable with who I was and where I was headed in life. I accomplished a lot of that in my three years there. I left with a new life and a hope that I would not crumble as I stepped out into the unknown territory of Atlanta, Georgia. <br />
I am still not 100% certain why it is that I had to move to Atlanta though. I don't know exactly what drew me to this place. It was the silent tug of God that brought me here, and even though I fought it, I'm glad I'm here. But I've been trying to figure out what it is I'm supposed to learn here. What great growth spurts do I have to go through? I know I'm here for an education, but I am in this specific setting for something bigger.<br />
I'm starting to think that maybe God is teaching me about community. I laugh now, but I was scared to death when I moved here. I was afraid I wouldn't find a support system, that I would be alone in a strange land with no one to care for me. Instead, I have found more support and love than I even thought imaginable. I am surrounded by people who love me for who I am. I know I had community like that before, but I was too broken to realize it was there or trust that it would really help me in my time of need. I had felt like an outsider within my own friend groups before, and now I feel like a full member.<br />
Recently I have been hanging out with a group of Anglican monks and they are teaching me a lot about what it means to be in Christian community. I see the bonds that have formed through living life together. There is a connectedness in that group.The morning and evening prayers I have experienced in their house have been some of the most intimate moments that I have had with God since I got here. They have been two or three brothers and myself in the altar room of their house, but I have felt the touch of God in some of those moments, the connection that brings all life together and unifies us as siblings in Christ. It has begun to help me see the communal identity of the body of Christ.<br />
While the idea of the communal body of Christ might seem high and lofty, something idyllically beautiful, it's really just sharing life together. It's opening up a little bit when you've had a bad day, it's sitting in silence and studying together, it's laughing and sighing as someone breaks yet another dish. It's letting everybody be themselves, and letting each person's gifts bless community as a whole. That is communal life, and that is a beautiful life. <br />
I can only hope and wait to learn more about community and life together as I grow over the next few years. The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-783535089144093759.post-5409350964320424532012-10-09T07:28:00.002-07:002012-10-09T07:28:42.685-07:00Numbers Don't Make YouWe got back our Old Testament tests today, and I must say, I'm not used to seeing that low of a score on a test. It threw me for a bit. My classmates starting comparing scores and looking over what they can improve on together in community, and I had to step away because it's still a little raw. I started wanting to judge myself based on my other classmates' test scores. Why didn't I do what this other person did? What did she do that was so much better than me? I felt compelled to start judging myself based on a number. So I drew back, and I came into a holy space away from the crowd. I stopped and just let God embrace me. I am worth so much more than a number, and truth be told, this number will not kill me, it will not make me lose my scholarship, it's just a number. I am more than a number, I am a beloved child of God who has come to this school to learn more about how to engage with my creator and with the communities God lovingly places me in. And when the numbers aren't what I hoped they would be, when I am not a perfect scholar, I just need to step back and remember that numbers don't make you. God makes you.The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-783535089144093759.post-58050645311635317012012-10-06T16:05:00.001-07:002012-10-06T16:05:22.405-07:00My WeekMy pastor called me today and made me think about everything that has been going on in my life recently. It's really quite fascinating how my life seems natural and normal, and it's really profound. Just this week I've hung out with Anglican monks, learned about Hebrew adjectives with my favorite study buddy, done my chaplaincy at a geriatric hospital, read the entire book of Exodus, worked in the community garden, met some really cool students from other seminaries in the city, and relaxed with other friends. I've laughed, I've sobbed, I've gotten mad at God and I've deepened my love and appreciation for my LORD. I also finally shaved my head. That's a lot of things, and I know that tomorrow and the next week will only bring more. I am blessed beyond measure. The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-783535089144093759.post-53386482957341625132012-09-16T07:33:00.001-07:002012-09-16T07:33:18.851-07:00"More Pastors Like You"I went out last night, and met some new people who aren't religious. I told them where I was going to school and everything and my plans to become a pastor. After a few more minutes, one of them said something that I've heard a lot recently. He said, "The world needs more pastors like you." While I don't disagree, that phrase always has a disheartening implication to it. It implies that he's never met a pastor like me. That is really sad to hear, because I know I didn't come out of a vacuum. Someone could just as easily say "the world needs more pastors like your mother, like your pastors, like your pastor friends, like your seminary colleagues..." I know a ton of pastors who are very similar to me in ideology, theology, and world view. So it's very sad to me that we're not the kind of pastors non-religious people see or think of when they hear the word "pastor". And if I'm to be honest, sometimes I don't think of my pastor friends when I hear the word "pastor" either. A lot of us in this culture have an image of fire and brimstone pastors who speak condemnation, not love. We think of pastors who would easily reject someone for their sexual orientation or gender identity. We think of pastors who appear to be "holier than thou" not down to earth. These are the pastors you often see on tv and in the streets protesting. It really is amazing how many people know the Westboro Baptist Church, but don't know that there are Christian denominations that ordain women and would be shocked to hear that there are plenty of LGBTQ pastors and church workers who don't have to live in the closet. If I could have one wish granted, I would wish that a "pastor like me" would attract the public eye, would go out there and be the voice of progressive Christianity to an America that needs to hear that we exist. I doubt very much that I am that pastor. I just want to be a relaxed, down to earth, loving person that people can relate to. So maybe the world doesn't need a pastor like me so much as it needs pastors, chuch leaders, and loving people like you. And maybe someone who reads this will be called to be the voice I'm searching for. Who knows?The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-783535089144093759.post-69519760812016751122012-09-09T12:13:00.000-07:002012-09-09T12:13:11.971-07:00Testing AssumptionsToday I went to the church that almost all the young United Methodist first year students at my seminary have started going to. The service was rooted in liturgy, the pastor (a grad of my seminary) talked about what it meant to be a progressive orthodox Christian (little o orthodox, someone who takes creeds and liturgy seriously), and everything was right on par with my theology. I was grateful that I had gone.<br />
I realized that I had made assumptions about my fellow students, and I'm sorry I did that. Somewhere in my history, I started to assume that if someone around my age is serious about the church and Christianity, they are usually more conservative than I am. I've had Christian friends around my age that hold similar beliefs, but for whatever reason they always seemed like a minority in my mind. I assumed that the twenty-somethings in seminary with me would naturally be a little more conservative, and they aren't.<br />
The majority of the students at my seminary really do hold similar beliefs to mine, and even if our beliefs differ, nobody's going to call me out or tell me that I'm wrong because of how I live my life. I am so excited to be in a Christian environment that is progressive and serious about the Bible and church traditions. I am so excited to be in a seminary where I don't feel like one of those crazy liberal kids, I'm actually a pretty typical student. Praise the Lord, because somehow I ended up in an environment where I fit in just fine. The Reverend Zeb Treloarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03848572858505098726noreply@blogger.com0